搞笑諺語英文

A. 搞笑英語小說和英語諺語

Reading enriches the mind.開卷有益。

Reading is to the mind while exercise to the body.讀書健腦，運動強身。

Respect yourself, or no one else will respect you.要人尊敬，必須自重。

Rome is not built in a day.冰凍三尺，非一日之寒。

Saying is one thing and doing another.言行不一。

Seeing is believing.眼見為實。

Seek the truth from facts.實事求是。

Send a wise man on an errand, and say nothing to him.智者當差，不用交代。

Set a thief to catch a thief.以賊捉賊。

Short accounts make long friends.好朋友勤算賬。

Something is better than nothing.聊勝於無。

Soon learn, soon forgotten.學得快，忘得快。

Soon ripe, soon rotten.熟得快，爛得快。

Speech is silver, silence is gold.能言是銀，沉默是金。

Still water run deep.靜水常深。

Strike the iron while it is hot.趁熱打鐵。

Success belongs to the persevering.堅持就是勝利。

Take things as they come.既來之，則安之。

Talking mends no holes.空談無補。

Talk of the devil and he will appear.說曹操，曹操就到。

Tall trees catch much wind.樹大招風。

Teach others by your example.躬親示範。

The best hearts are always the bravest.無私者無畏。

The best man stumbles.偉人也有犯錯時。

The cat shuts its eyes when stealing.掩耳盜鈴。

The danger past and God forgotten.過河拆橋。

The darkest hour is nearest the dawn.黎明前的黑暗。

The darkest place is under the candlestick.燭台底下最暗。

The devil knows many things because he is old.老馬識途。

The devil sometimes speaks the truth.魔鬼有時也會說真話。

The die is cast.木已成舟。

The early bird catches the worm.早起的鳥兒有蟲吃。

The end justifies the means.只要目的正當，可以不擇手段。

The end makes all equal.死亡面前，人人平等。

The eye is bigger than the belly.貪多嚼不爛。

The farthest way about is the nearest way home.抄近路反而繞遠路。

The finest diamond must be cut.玉不琢，不成器。

The fire is the test of gold, adversity of strong man.烈火驗真金，艱難磨意志。

The first step is the only difficulty.邁出第一步是最艱難的。

The fox knew too much, that's how he lost his tail.機關算盡太聰明，反誤了卿卿性命。

The fox preys farthest from home.兔子不吃窩邊草。

The frog in the well knows nothing of the great ocean.坐井觀天。

The grass is greener on the other side.這山望著那山高。

The greatest talkers are always least doers.語言的巨人總是行動的矮子。

The higher up, the greater the fall.爬得高，摔得慘。

The leopard cannot change its spots.本性難移。 The more noble, the more humble.人越高尚，越謙虛。

The more wit, the less courage.初生牛犢不怕虎。

The outsider sees the most of the game.旁觀者清。

The pen is mightier than the sword.筆能殺人。

The pot calls the kettle black.五十步笑百步。

There are spots in the sun.太陽也有黑點。

There are two sides to every question.問題皆有兩面。

There is a skeleton in the cupboard.家家有本難念的經。

There is kindness to be found everywhere.人間處處有溫情。

There is no general rule without some exception.任何法規均有例外。

There is no medicine against death.沒有長生不老葯。

There is no place like home.金窩銀窩不如咱的狗窩。

There is no royal road to learning.書山有路勤為徑，學海無涯苦作舟。

The style is the man.字如其人。

The tongue is not steel, yet it cuts.人言可畏。

The water that bears the boat is the same that swallows it up.水能載舟，亦能覆舟。

The wise man knows he knows nothing, the fool thinks he knows all.清者自清，濁者自濁。

The wolf has a winning game when the shepherds quarrel.螳螂捕蟬，黃雀在後。

The world is a ladder for some to go up and others to go down.世界如階梯，有人上有人下。

The world is but a little place, after all.海內存知己，天涯若比鄰。

Think twice before you do.三思而後行。

Things at the worst will mend.否極泰來。

Time and tide wait for no man.時不我待。

Time cures all things.時間是醫治一切創傷的良葯。

Time flies.光陰似箭。

Time is money.時間就是金錢。

Time lost cannot be won again.時光流逝，不可復得。

Time past cannot be called back again.時間不能倒流。

Time tries all.路遙知馬力，日久見人心。

Tit for tat is fair play.人不犯我，我不犯人；人若犯我，我必犯人。

To err is human.人非聖賢，孰能無過。

To know everything is to know nothing.什麼都知道，一如什麼都不知道。

To know oneself is true progress.人貴有自知之明。

Tomorrow never comes.我生待明日，萬事成蹉跎。

Too much familiarity breeds contempt.過分熟悉會使人互不服氣。

Too much knowledge makes the head bald.學問太多催人老。

Too much liberty spills all.自由放任，一事無成。

Too much praise is a burden.過多誇獎，反成負擔。

To save time is to lengthen life.節約時間就是延長生命。

Touch pitch, and you will be defiled.常在河邊走，哪有不濕鞋。

Troubles never come singly.福無雙至，禍不單行。

Truth never grows old.真理永存。

Turn over a new leaf.洗心革面，改過自新。

Two dogs strive for a bone, and a third runs away with it.鷸蚌相爭，漁翁得利。

Two heads are better than one.一個好漢三個幫。

Two of a trade seldom agree.同行是冤家。

Two wrongs do not make a right.別人錯了，不等於你對了。

Unity is strength.團結就是力量。

Unpleasant advice is a good medicine.忠言逆耳利於行。

Until all is over one's ambition never dies.不到黃河心不死。

Venture a small fish to catch a great one.吃小虧佔大便宜。

Virtue is fairer far than beauty.美德遠遠勝過美貌。

Walls have ears.小心隔牆有耳。

Wash your dirty linen at home.家醜不可外揚。

Water dropping day by day wears the hardest rock away.滴水穿石。

Wealth is nothing without health.失去健康，錢再多也沒用。

We know not what is good until we have lost it.好東西，失去了才明白。

Well begun is half done.好的開始，是成功的一半。

We never know the worth of water till the well is dry.井干方知水可貴。

We shall never have friends if we expect to find them without fault.欲求完美無缺的朋友必然成為孤家寡人。

We should never remember the benefits we have offered nor forget the favor received.自己的好事別去提，別人的恩惠要銘記。

Wet behind the ears.乳臭未乾。

Whatever you do, do with all your might.不管做什麼，都要一心一意。

What is learned in the cradle is carried to the grave.兒時所學，終生難忘。

What's done cannot be undone.生米煮成熟飯了。

What's lost is lost.失者不可復得。

What we do willingly is easy.願者不難。

When in Rome, do as the Romans do.入國問禁，入鄉隨俗。

When everybody's somebody then nobody's anybody.人人都偉大，世間沒豪傑。

When sorrow is asleep, wake it not.傷心舊事別重提。

When sorrows come, they come not single spies, but in battalions.新仇舊恨，齊上心頭。

When the fox preaches, take care of your geese.黃鼠狼給雞拜年，沒安好心。

When wine is in truth, wit is out.酒後吐真言。

Where there is a will, there is a way.有志者事竟成。

Where there is life, there is hope.留得青山在，不怕沒柴燒。

Where there is smoke, there is fire.事出有因。

While the priest climbs a post, the devil climbs ten.道高一尺，魔高一丈。

Who chatters to you, will chatter of you.搬弄口舌者必是小人。

Whom the gods love die young.好人不長命。

Wise man have their mouths in their hearts, fools have their hearts in their mouths.智者嘴在心裡，愚者心在嘴裡。

Work makes the workman.勤工出巧匠。

You cannot burn the candle at both ends.蠟燭不能兩頭點，精力不可過分耗。

You cannot eat your cake and have it.魚與熊掌，不可得兼。

You can take a horse to the water but you cannot make him drink.強扭的瓜不甜。

You may know by a handful the whole sack.由一斑可知全貌。

You never know what you can till you try.是驢子是馬，拉出來遛遛。 檢舉 回答人的補充 2009-08-10 14:49 There is no royal road to learning. 學習沒有捷徑While the prospects are bright, the road has twists and turns.前途是光明的，道路是曲折的。Man proposes, but God disposes.謀事在人，成事在天。Whatever you do, do with all your might.不管做什麼，都要一心一意 Genius is nothing but labor and diligence. 天才不過是勤奮而已。
What is learned in the cradle is carried to the grave.兒時所學，終生難忘。A man becomes learned by asking questions. 不恥下問才能有學問。
All things are difficult before they are easy. 凡事總是由難而易。
Care and diligence bring luck. 謹慎和勤奮才能抓住機遇。
Confidence in yourself is the first step on the road to success. 自信是走向成功的第一步。
Custom makes all things easy. 有個好習慣，事事皆不難。
Doing is better than saying. 與其掛在嘴上，不如落實在行動上。
Do nothing by halves. 凡事不可半途而廢。
Eat to live, but not live to eat. 人吃飯是為了活著，但活著不是為了吃飯。
Every man has his faults. 金無足赤，人無完人。
Every man is the architect of his own fortune. 自己的命運自己掌握。
Every minute counts. 分秒必爭。
No cross, no crown. 不經歷風雨，怎麼見彩虹。
No pleasure without pain. 沒有苦就沒有樂。
No pains, no gains. 沒有付出就沒有收獲。
No rose without a thorn. 沒有不帶刺的玫瑰。
One eyewitness is better than ten hearsays. 百聞不如一見。
Observation is the best teacher. 觀察是最好的老師。
Nothing is difficult to the man who will try. 世上無難事，只要肯登攀。

B. 中文搞笑英語翻譯

常見搞笑翻譯如下：

1、The king is awalys lucky 王老吉

2、Open water room. 開水間。

3、know is know noknow is noknow 知之為知之，不知為不知。

4、American Chinese not enough 美中不足

5、heart flower angry open 心花怒放

6、go past no mistake past 走過路過，不要錯過

7、as far as you go to die 有多遠，死多遠！

8、If you want money,I have no;if you want life,I have one! 要錢沒有，要命一條

9、you me you me 彼此彼此

10、seven up eight down 七上八下

11、love who who 愛誰誰

12、no three no four不三不四

13、morning three night four 朝三暮四

14、red face konw me 紅顏知己

15、ten three point 十三點

16、no care three seven two ten one 不管三七二十一

17、You don』t bird me, I don』t bird you.你不鳥我，我也不鳥你。

18、You ask me,I ask who？你問我，我去問誰？

拓展資料

1、英漢翻譯時不能英漢直譯，以免造成上面的笑話。

2、翻譯是在准確、通順的基礎上，把一種語言信息轉變成另一種語言信息的行為。翻譯是將一種相對陌生的表達方式，轉換成相對熟悉的表達方式的過程。其內容有語言、文字、圖形、符號和視頻翻譯。

C. 要一個超級搞笑的英語笑話帶中文翻譯，高中水平

Two Pieces of Cake
Tom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please?
Mom: Certainly -- take this piece and cut it two!
兩塊蛋來糕源
湯姆：媽媽，我可以吃兩塊蛋糕嗎？
媽媽：當然可以----拿這塊蛋糕把它切成兩塊吧！

Mother: Mary, why do you yell and scream so much? Play quietly like Eddie. See, he doesn't make a sound.
Mary: Of course he doesn't. Mom, it's part of the game we are playing. He is Daddy coming home late, and I'm you.
媽媽：瑪麗，你為什麼這樣大喊大叫的？ 為什麼不能像艾迪那樣安安靜靜的玩兒呢？你看艾迪一聲兒都不出。
瑪麗：媽媽，艾迪當然不會出聲了，因為我們倆正在玩爸爸回家遲到的游戲呢，他扮演爸爸，我扮演你。

D. 英語諺語搞笑翻譯

when pig can fly
當豬會飛的時候
意思是：猴年馬月

E. 短的，非常好笑的英語笑話，帶翻譯

The
little
boy
did
not
like
the
look
of
the
barking
dog.
"It's
all
right,"
said
a
gentleman,
"don't
be
afraid.
Don't
you
know
the
proverb:
Barking
dogs
don't
bite?"
"Ah,
yes,"
answered
the
little
boy.
"I
know
the
proverb,
but
does
the
dog
know
the
proverb,
too?"
狗也知道這個諺語嗎？
一個小男孩非常不喜歡狗狂叫的樣子。
「沒有關系，」一位先生說，「不用害怕，你知道這條諺語嗎：『吠狗不咬人。』」
「啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道嗎？」
一些趣味問答
Q:
What's
the
difference
between
a
monkey
and
a
flea?
A:
A
monkey
can
have
fleas,
but
a
flea
can't
have
monkeys.
猴子會和跳蚤有什麼不同呢？你可能會直接的想到它們倆是一大一小。但除此之外呢，那就是猴子身上可以長跳蚤，而跳蚤身上卻不能有猴子。這個答案很有意思吧？
Q:
How
can
you
most
irritate
a
farmer?
A:
By
treading
on
his
corn?
如果你踩了農夫的玉米或是穀物，他肯定會生氣的；而如果你踩了農夫腳底的雞眼，他會更生氣。Corn既可以表示「玉米/穀物」，也有「雞眼」的意思。
Q:
Which
is
the
strongest
creature
in
the
world?
A:
The
snail.
It
carries
its
house
on
its
back.
因為snail（蝸牛）的後背上總是背著一所房子，所以說蝸牛是世界上最強壯的生物是不足為奇的。你說呢？
Q:
What
do
people
do
in
a
clock
factory?
A:
They
make
faces
all
day.
一看到make
faces這個短語，你可千萬別以為是在鍾表廠工作的人整天都做鬼臉呀！因為除了這個意思以外，它還可以從字面上解釋為製造鍾面。
Q:
How
do
you
stop
a
sleepwalker
from
walking
in
his
sleep?
A:
Keep
him
awake.
怎樣才能不讓夢游者（sleepwalker）夢游（walk
in
his
sleep）呢？最簡單的方法就是不讓他睡覺。雖然這不是治療方法，但如果讓夢游者醒著呢，他的確就不會去夢遊了。

F. 急需一些英語的常用諺語或者是中文譯英文的諺語

Action is the proper fruit of knowledge.行動是知識的巧果。
· A creaking door hangs long on its hinges.戶樞不蠹。
· A crafty knave needs no broker.狡猾的流氓，不需居間人。
· A covetous man is good to none but worse to himself.貪婪的人對別人毫無好處，對自己卻壞處更大。
· A contented mind is perpetual feast.知足常樂。
· A constant guest is never welcome.久住非佳賓，常來不歡迎。
· A common danger causes common action.同仇敵愾。
· A cock is valiant on his own nghill.夜郎自大。
· A close mouth catches no flies.病從口入，禍從口出。
· A clear fast is better than a dirty breakfast.寧為清貧，不為濁富。
· A clear conscience laughs at false accusations.白日不做虧心事，夜半敲門心不驚。
· A clear conscience is a sure card.光明磊落，勝券在握。
· A clear conscience is a soft pillow.問心無愧，高枕無憂。
· A clean hand wants no washing.身正不怕影子斜。
· A cheerful wife is the joy of life.快樂的妻子是生活的樂事。
· A change of work is as good as a rest.調換一下工作是很好的休息。
· Accidents will happen.天有不測風雲。
· A cat may look at a king.貓也有權晉見國王。
· A candle lights others and consumes itself.蠟燭焚自身，光亮照別人。
· A burnt child dreads the fire.一朝被蛇咬，十年怕井繩。
· A burden of one磗 choice is not felt.自己選的擔子不嫌重。
· Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.相聚愛益切，離別情更深。
· A borrowed cloak does not keep one warm.借來的斗篷不暖身。
· A book that remains shut is but a block.有書閉卷不閱讀，無異是一塊木頭。
· A book is the same today as it always was and it will never change.一本好書今天如此，將來也如此，永不改變。
· A blind man will not thank you for a looking-glass.秋波送盲，白費痴情。
· A blind man who leans against a wall imagines that it磗 the boundary of the world.坐井觀天。
· A bit in the morning is better than nothing all day.略有勝於全無。
· A bird may be known by its song.什麽鳥唱什麽歌。
· A bird is known by its note, and a man by his talk.聞其歌知其鳥，聽其言知其人
· A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.雙鳥在林不如一鳥在手。
· A beggar磗 purse is bottomless.乞丐的錢袋是無底洞。
· A bargain is a bargain.達成的協議不可撕毀。
· A bad workman quarrels with his tools.拙匠常怨工具差。
· A bad thing never dies.壞事傳千年。
· A bad padlock invites a picklock.開門揖盜。
· A bad custom is like a good cake, better broken than kept.壞習慣像鮮餡餅，分食要比保存好。
· A bad custom is like a good cake, better broken than kept.壞習慣像鮮餡餅，分食要比保存好。
· A bad conscience is a snake in one磗 heart.做賊心虛。
· A bad conscience is a snake in one磗 heart.做賊心虛
· A bad compromise is better than a good lawsuit.吃虧的和解也比勝訴強。
· A bad bush is better than the open field.有勝於無。
· A bad beginning makes a bad ending.惡其始者必惡其終。
· No wisdom like silence智者寡言
· Necessity knows no law鋌而走險
· Many hands make light work人多好辦事
· Don磘 play the goat不要胡鬧
· They』re a barrel of laughs他們很搞笑
· This movie was just a hype這部電影完全是在炒作
· the shortest straw下下簽
· The news came as a bombshell這個消息猶如晴天霹靂
· feeling low意氣消沉
· These are more than old wives?tales這些可不是無稽之談
· That』ll save your skin那可幫你度過難關
· Every bad has some good 壞事情也有好的一面
· Some things rub them the wrong way他們被惹怒了
· Stay put停住不動
· to fly off the handle突然生氣、發怒
· He is really on the ball他真的思路很敏捷
· got savoir faire言行得體
· He has never rested on his laurels他從不滿足目前的成就
· Jump down someone』s throat生氣地批評
· put a roof over one』s head找個地方安頓
· faced the music報應
· blinded with science無言以對
· Off one』s rocker缺乏理智
· old goat老古板（通常指年長者）
· Welcome！It』s lovely to see you歡迎！見到你真高興！
· What』s gotten into you？你怎麼了？
· Coffee kept them on the go咖啡使他們充滿活力；
· Shine on擱在一旁；
· Monkey（around）with亂動；
· I think I get the drift我知道了；
· get the drift明白，了解
· The meeting will start at 10 o碿lock sharp會議十點准時開始；
· like taking candy from a baby形容某事易如反掌
· Home is where the heart is家是心之所在
· From the word go 從頭到尾；
· They help make it less of a dog磗 life他們幫忙改善生活；
· Half-baked 不成熟的
· bend the rules at times網開一面
· Spill one』s guts說出實情
· For heaven磗 sake！老天！表示驚奇或憤怒的感嘆語
· Fly-by-night不可靠的，不可信任的
· Nervous wreck緊張，激動
· Pull through脫險，渡過難關
· Thumb through 匆匆的閱讀

Better an open enemy than a false friend. 明槍易躲，暗箭難防.
Better are small fish than an empty dish. 有勝於無.
Better be alone than in bad company. 交損友不如無友.
Better be out of the world than out of fashion. 不合潮流不如脫離塵世.
Better be poor than wicked. 寧可做窮人，不要做壞人.
Better be the head of a dog than the tail of a lion. 寧為犬首，不作獅尾.
Better be the head of an ass than the tail of a horse. 寧為驢頭，不為馬尾.
Better deny at once than promise long. 輕諾必寡信.
Better die with honour than live with shame. 與其忍辱偷生，不如光榮而死.
Better early than late. 及早不及晚。
Better eye sore than all blind. 眼痛總比瞎眼好.
Better go to bed supperless than rise in debt. 寧可餓肚子，切莫去借債.
Better good neighbours near than relations far away. 遠親不如近鄰.
Better half an egg than empty shell. 半隻蛋也比空殼好.
Better is the neighbour's hen than mine. 人莫知其苗之碩.
Better late than never. 遲做總比不做好.
Better lose a jest than a friend. 寧可不說一句俏皮話，以免得罪朋友們.
Better lose the saddle than the horse. 吃小虧佔大便宜.
Better master one than engage with ten. 精通一事勝於會十事.
Better one-eyed than stone-blind. 獨眼總比全瞎好.
Better poor with honour than rich with shame. 窮得光榮，勝過富得可恥.
Better say nothing than nothing to the purpose. 與其說話不中肯，不如一言不發好.
Better some of a pudding than none of a pie. 聊勝於無.
Better the foot slip than the tongue trip. 寧可滑跤，不可失言.
Better to ask the way than go astray. 問路總比迷路好。
Better to do well than to say well. 說得好不如做得好.
Better unlearned than ill-learned. 學而不化，不如不學。
Better wear out than rust out. 與其閑散不如忙碌.
Better wit than wealth. 智力勝於財富.
Better without gold than without friends. 寧可沒有金錢，不可沒有朋友。
Between friends all is common. 朋友之間不分彼此.
Between the cup and the lip a morsel may slip. 功虧一簣.
Between two stools one falls to the ground. 腳踏兩頭要落空.
Beware beginnings. 慎始為上.
Beware of a man of one book. 不要與一個有專業知識的人爭論.
Beware of a silent dog and still water. 警惕無聲之狗會咬人，平靜之水會覆舟.
Beware of him who regards not his reputation. 要謹防不重自己名譽的人.
Big mouthfuls ofter choke. 貪多嚼不爛.
Bind the sack before it be full. 做事應適可而止.
Birds of a feather flock together. 物以類聚，人以群分.
Birth is much, but breeding is more. 出身固然重要，教養更且重要.
Bite off more than one can chew. 貪多咽不下.
Bite the hand that feeds one. 恩將仇報.
Bitter pills may have wholesome effects. 良葯苦口利於病.

G. 誰有搞笑的英語文章最好有中文對照!

One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living.The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree.The city man said to the farmer, "I see that your pig likes apples, but isn't that quite a waste of time?"The farmer replied, "What's time to a pig?"
一天，有一個城市裡的遊客來到一個小鄉村，在鄉間路上開著車，想看看農庄是什麼樣子，也想看看農夫怎樣種田過日子。這位城裡人看見一位農夫在宅後的草地上，手中抱著一頭豬，並把它舉得高高的，好讓它能夠吃到樹上的蘋果。城裡人對農夫說，"我看你的豬挺喜歡吃蘋果的，但是，這不是很浪費時間嗎?"那位農夫回答說，"時間對豬有什麼意義?"

One girl went to the preacher and confessed her sin.
Girl: Father, I have sinned.
Preacher: What did you do, little girl?
Girl: Yesterday, I called a man a son of a Bitch.
Preacher: Why? What did he do to you?
Girl: He touched my breast.
Preacher: You mean like this? (The guy did it.)
Girl: (A little shy from the touch) Yes.
Preacher: That's no reason to call him that.
Girl: But he also took off my cloth.
Preacher: You mean like this? (He did it again.)
Girl: Yes, that's what he did.
Preacher: That's still no reason to call him that.
Girl: And he put his you-know-what into my you-know-what...
Preacher: (evil laugh...) You mean like this? (And you-know-what)
Girl: (After a few minutes...) Ugh... Yeah, that's what he did...
Preacher: My dear girl, that's still no reason to call him a...
Girl: But he had AIDS!!
Preacher: THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!

Where is the father?

Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.

"Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"

"Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?"

The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures."

父親在哪兒？

兄弟倆在看一些漂亮的油畫。

「看，」哥哥說，「這些畫多漂亮呀！」

「是啊，」弟弟說道，「可是在所有這些畫中，只有媽媽和孩子。那爸爸去哪兒了呢？」

哥哥想了會兒，然後解釋道：「很明顯，他當時正在畫這些畫唄。」

The poor husband

"You can't imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife," the man complained to his friend. "She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.

可憐的丈夫

「你根本無法想像和我妻子打交道是多麼的難，」一個男人對他的朋友訴苦說，「她問我一個問題，然後自己回答了，過後又花半個小時跟我解釋為什麼我的答案是錯的。」

Does the dog know the proverb, too?

The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.

"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"

"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"

狗也知道這個諺語嗎？

一個小男孩非常不喜歡狗狂叫的樣子。

「沒有關系，」一位先生說，「不用害怕，你知道這條諺語嗎：『吠狗不咬人。』」

「啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道嗎？」
參考資料：http://..com/question/23510460.html?si=3

H. 求幾則關於幽默的名人名言，中英文 不是要幽默的，是要關於幽默的。

幽默是真正的民主（羅·安·約翰遜）

●自由產生詼諧，詼諧也產生自由（讓·保爾·里希特）

●幽默是生活波濤中的救生圈（拉布）

●幽默乃是尊嚴的肯定，又是對人類超然物外的胸襟之明證（羅曼尼·葛瑞）

●幽默是絕不肯正經其事的荒謬感（烏錫爾）

●幽默是藏身於笑話之後的嚴肅（約·韋斯）

●幽默帶來悟力和寬容，冷嘲則帶來深刻而不友善的理解（阿格尼斯·雷普利爾）

●總有人註定要因某個玩笑而受苦（赫茲里特）

●幽默與嚴肅互為驗石，因為不願接受善意的玩笑，其中必有疑處，而經不住審度的玩笑也一定是智慧（高爾克亞）

●幽默是表明工人對自己事業具有信心並且表明自己占著優勢的標志（恩格斯）

●探求如何在一切事物前發出笑聲和從一切事物中尋找出可笑之處，這兩者之間存在著天淵之別（舍夫茨別利）

●任何虛假的庄嚴，都會在幽默面前被剝去偽狀（維吾爾族）

●幽默可謂對生活不調合部分善意的考慮以及藝術的表現……而幽默的根本則是人性善良的一面（英·李卡克）

●幽默是多麼艷麗的服飾，又是何等忠誠的衛士！它永遠勝過詩人和作家的智慧；它本身就是才華，它能杜絕愚昧（司各特）

●可以說，詼諧幽默是人們在社交場上所穿的最漂亮的服飾（薩克雷）

●幽默被公正地譽為最佳詩才（托·卡萊爾）

●缺乏幽默感的人不能算是很完善的人（柯勒律治）

●你可以假裝嚴肅，卻無法假裝詼諧（薩夏·吉特里）

●無稽之談比非凡的機智更能使我們發出笑聲，因為無稽之談更適合於我們，更符合我們的天性（德·瓦盧瓦）

I. 麻煩好友們給我找一篇好幽默，英文的，大約60—100個單詞。或找兩條英文的名言諺語，別太長，謝謝！

I'm Glad

A teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making
others glad. "Now, children," said she , "has anyone of you
ever made someone else glad?"
"Teacher,"said a small boy,"I made someone glad yesterday."
"Well done. Who was that?"
"My granny."
"Good boy. Now tell us how you made your grandmother glad."
" I went to see her yesterday, and stayed with her three
hours. Then I said to her, 'Granny, I'm going home,' and she
said, 'Well, I'm glad'!"

我很高興

一個老師在對學生講使別人高興的重要性。「現在，孩子們，」她說：「你們當中有誰讓別人高興過？」
「我，老師，」一個小男孩說：「昨天我就使別人高興過。」
「做得好，是誰呢？」
「我奶奶。」
「好孩子。現在告訴我們，你是怎樣使你奶奶高興的。」
「是這樣的，老師。我昨天去看她，在她那兒呆了三個小時。然後我跟她說：『奶奶，我要回家了。』她說：『啊，我很高興！』」

Every dog has its day.

指富貴無常，凡人皆有得意的時候。

（一個潦倒的人，以前也可能風光過，做人要厚道，不能看低別人。）

活學活用：

— love me, love my dog. 愛屋及烏（打狗就是欺主了）

— Don't wake a sleeping dog. 切莫打草驚蛇，不要生事。

— walk the dog everyday. 每日帶狗散步。

— dog leash 狗鏈； dog collar 狗項圈

A good conscience is a soft pillow.

不做虧心事，不怕鬼叫門。

活學活用：
conscience

A clear conscience laughs at false accusation.
[諺] 只要問心無愧， 旁人的指責可一笑置之。

A clear conscience is a sure card.
[諺] 只要問心無愧， 旁人的指責可一笑置之。

A good conscience is a constant feast.
[諺] 問心無愧， 高枕無憂。

A good conscience is a soft pillow.
[諺] 問心無愧， 高枕無憂。

A guilty conscience is a self -accuser.
[諺]做賊心虛。

A guilty conscience needs no accuser.
[諺]做賊心虛。

A quiet conscience sleeps in thunder.
[諺]沒做虧心事， 不怕鬼叫門。