十萬個冷笑話全集

『陸』 求十萬個冷笑話全集的MP3

請採納我的問題1、一個女生前一天晚上得到男朋友的訂婚戒指，但竟沒有一個同學注意到，令她忿忿不平。到下午大家坐著談天的時候，她突然站起來大聲說：「哎呀，這里真熱呀，我看我還是把戒指脫下來吧。」2、女主人把女傭叫到面前問她：「你是否懷孕了？」「是啊！」女傭回道。「虧你還說得出口，你還沒有結婚，難道不覺得害羞嗎？」女主人再次訓。「我為什麼要害羞，女主人你自己不也懷孕了嗎？」「可是我懷的是我丈夫的！」女主人生氣地反駁。「我也是啊！」女傭高興地附和。3、一個人騎摩托車喜歡反穿衣服，就是把口子在後面扣上，可以擋風。一天他酒後駕駛， 翻了，一頭栽在路旁。警察趕到：警察甲：好嚴重的車禍。警察乙：是啊，腦袋都撞到後面去了。警察甲：嗯，還有呼吸，我們幫他把頭轉回來吧。警察乙：好.....一、二使勁，轉回來了。警察甲：嗯，沒有呼吸了.......4、在一條七拐八拐的鄉村公路上，因為時常發生車禍，所以常常有一些鬼故事發生，有一天晚上，有一個計程車司機看見路邊有一個長發披肩，身著白衣的女人向他招手，因為這個司機沒有見過鬼，所以大膽的停下來讓她上車了，這一路上,司機雖然不信有鬼，心裡也毛毛的，所以時常從後視鏡看後面的女人，開著開著，突然司機發現那個女人不見了！司機嚇了一大跳，趕緊踩了一個剎車！只見那個女人滿臉是血，表情猙獰。司機嚇的牙直打顫。突然那女人開口了：「你會不會開車啊！我低頭系個鞋帶你突然一剎車我把鼻子都撞破了……」5、一個病人去看病，醫生檢查了他，皺著眉頭說：「您病得太嚴重了，恐怕不會活多久了。」 病人：「求您告訴我我還能活多久？」 醫生：「十……」 病人著急地問：「十什麼？十年？？十個月？？？十天？？？？？」 醫生：「十，九，八，七，六，五……」6、老師：「你能說一些18世紀科學家共同特點嗎？」學生：「能，他們都死了。」7、犀糞蜣和蚊子談戀愛，蜣問蚊子是做什麼工作的，蚊子說：「護士，打針的。」蜣一拍大腿：「緣分吶，我是中葯局搓葯丸的…」8、一非洲人住在某一賓館。夜半，起火，不明原因。非洲人見狀顧不了那麼許多，光著身子就跑出去了。消防員見狀驚呼：「我的媽呀！都燒的糊了吧區的了還能跑那麼快！」9、一個人想出國考察，但必須得到老總批准。於是他向老總請示，老總給了他一張字條，上面寫著：「Go ahead」。 那人想：「Go ahead=前進，老總是批准了。」於是他開始打點行李。 一個同事見到了他問：「你在做什啊？？」他說：「我准備出國考察，老總批准了，給我寫了『Go ahead』。」 同事一見條就樂了：「咱們老總根本就沒批准！！咱老總的英語水平你還不知道，他這是在說去個頭！」10、牧師對買了他馬和馬車的農夫說：「這匹馬只能聽懂教會的語言，叫"感謝上帝"它就跑;叫"贊美上帝"它才停下。」農夫將信將疑，他試著喊了一聲感謝上帝，那匹馬立刻飛奔起來，越跑越快。一隻跑到懸崖邊上驚恐的農夫才想起讓它停下來的口令「贊美上帝」。果然，馬停下來了。死裡逃生的農夫長出一口氣：「感謝上帝………」我打了很久，請採納1 the night before, a girl get boyfriend engagement ring, but no one noticed the classmate, make her antics. You sit and chat in the afternoon, she suddenly stood up and shouted: \"oh, it's really hot in here, I think I'd better take off your ring.\" 2, the mistress called the maid to ask her: \"are you pregnant?\" \"Yes!\" The maid answered. Export \"kui you still say, you are not married, don't you feel shy?\" The hostess training again. \"Why should I be shy, you don't the hostess also pregnant?\" \"But I conceive is my husband!\" The hostess retorted angrily. \"Me too!\" The maid happy to echo. 3, a man riding a motorcycle like the dress, is to cut on the back, can the wind. Drunk driving one day, he turned over, a planted on the road. Police: police a: a good serious car accident. Policeman b: yes, his head hit the back. Po1: well, still breathing, let's help him turn his head back. Po2: good... One, two, turn back. Policeman a: well, not breathing... 4, turn in a curvy country road, because often in a car accident, so often have some ghost story, one night, there's a taxi driver saw the side of the road have a long hair shawls, dressed in a white woman waved to him, because the driver didn't see a ghost, so bold stopped to let her get on the bus, along the way, the driver doesn't believe in ghosts, the in the mind also maomao, so often the woman behind the rearview mirror to see, open open, the driver found the woman suddenly disappeared! The driver startled, hurriedly stepped on a brake! I saw the woman face is blood, grim expression. The driver frighten of teeth chatter. Suddenly the woman spoke: \"would you drive! I bow to fasten shoelaces are you smashed through a sudden brake my nose...\" 5, a patient to see a doctor, the doctor examined him, frowning said: \"you too serious ill, I'm afraid I won't live much longer.\" Patient: \"please tell me how long will I live?\" Doctor: \"ten...\" Patient anxiously asked: \"what? Ten years?? Ten months??? Ten days?????\" Doctor: \"ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five...\" 6, teacher: \"can you say some 18 th-century scientists common characteristics?\" Student: \"yes, they are all dead.\" 7, rhino poop Qiang and mosquito fall in love, Qiang asked a mosquito is to do what work, the mosquito said: \"nurse, give or take an injection.\" Qiang a clap a thigh: \"the fate, I am a traditional Chinese medicine bureau rub pills...\" 8, the africans live in a hotel. In the midnight, a fire, unknown reason. Before rushing so many africans, naked and ran out. Firefighters said exclaimed: \"my mama ah! All paste the burned area can run so fast!\" 9, a person wants to go abroad, but it must be approved by boss. So he to the manager for instructions, the boss gave him a note, it read: \"Go ahead\". The man thought, \"Go ahead = progress, boss is approved.\" So he started to packing. A colleague to see he asked: \"what are you doing?\" He said: \"I'm ready to Go abroad investigation, boss approved, wrote me 'Go ahead'.\" Colleague of joy at the sight of article: \"let's boss haven't approved!!!!! Our boss English don't you know, he is said to head!\" 10, priests to buy his horse and carriage of the farmer said, \"this horse can only understand the language of the church, call\" thank god \"it ran; called\" praise god \"it didn't stop.\" Farmer track, he tried to thank god gave a cry, the horse gallop, immediately ran faster and faster. A run to the edge of the cliff frightened farmer remembered that let it stop password \"praise god\". Sure enough, the horse stopped. Close the farmer grows a sigh: \"thank god.........\"I played for a long time, please

『柒』 求十萬個冷笑話第一季、第二季動畫全集MP4

只有第一季的http://share.dmhy.org/topics/view/346605_GB_1280x720_x264_aac.html，回mp4格式答

『捌』 求十萬個冷笑話大電影第一部的資源！

你好，十萬個冷笑話資源網頁鏈接《十萬個冷笑話》的責編魔恩表示，當時內製作動畫版容的創作動機，是希望把國內一些雖然畫面不夠好，但是有足夠的創意與新意的好故事展現給並不熟悉動漫領域的人們，讓更多的人知道我們也是有好的原創漫畫故事的。不希望好作品被埋沒，爭取更大程度的展現作品的魅力，並保持原作的初衷，是製作《十萬個冷笑話》動畫的中心與出發點。

『玖』 十萬個冷笑話第二季的動畫目錄

超人篇（2013年12月31日）
拉完翔變身的大便超人，對抗強勁對手的獨特方法。 世界末日4+一代宗師篇（2014年1月29日）
男主角獨特的殺龍方式，黃飛鴻與霍元甲的口語較量。 哪吒3（2月28日播）
哪吒自殺力保陳塘關，哪吒與李靖感人的父子親情。 世界末日5（3月30日播）
鳥不拉屎大王半裸呆萌出場，福祿小金剛拖戲炫酷登場。 一代宗師篇+金銀斧頭篇（4月30日播）
黃飛鴻與霍元甲的搞基武鬥，河神與年輕樵夫的神奇故事。（本動畫目錄由混跡邇軒編寫提供，並非官方編寫。） 世界末日6
鳥不拉屎大王輸掉比賽，末日少年毀滅地球。 西遊1+舌尖上的中原
世界末日篇畫上句號，新番來了，此次這群毫無節操的人為我們帶來的是「西遊篇」，不過你們的配音都腫么回事？沒錢請人了嘛？喂！整片嘰嘰喳喳或者咩咩...羊駝都比你們負責任啊喂！ 西遊2+十冷公益小廣告
孫悟空向菩提祖師學七十二變防三災，獲贍D五六五六筋斗雲。結尾為丟手絹改版。 西遊3
孫悟空回花果山，又過水簾洞，打敗侵佔地盤的怪獸。 愛情故事
跨越星球與種族的愛情故事 有妖氣電視
商品介紹：電視，實則一個套著電視頭套的緊身衣變態男。 女媧造人
女媧造人，女人是蘿莉，男人則是坨土球。人類繁衍遭阻！關鍵時刻，福祿小金剛及其兒子小剛剛拯救人類！

『拾』 更新快的站！ 十萬個冷笑話全集百度影音 , 要高清的哈

已經出來第二集了，話說這時間跨越真大啊，苦等第三集
希望採納哦......